


The Weight of My Love For You

by DamsInDistress



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-26
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-06-04 15:55:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6664927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DamsInDistress/pseuds/DamsInDistress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It took Max a while to realize it but love has strange way of bringing people together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Weight of My Love For You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [F1_rabbit](https://archiveofourown.org/users/F1_rabbit/gifts).



Max is young. Only 18 and breaking many 'youngest ever' records. It's not really something he aimed for, just things that go with his age. Sometimes Max wonders when he'll really be able to break the records he wants to break, like streak of poles and wins, those that would look good when he's retired. 

Max realizes that it's not really the records that matter in his life in the long run but his firsts. He's always heard the phrase _'you'll always remember your first'_ all the time when he was growing up. Remembers his mother showing him a box she's kept that's full of things when he was still a baby. He looks at the small pair of boots and wonder if he was really ever that small as he places them on his palm. 

When his friends asked Max about his first crush he was caught off guard by the question. He thinks back when he was still in school, of anyone that's caught his eye but couldn't form a name or think of anyone in particular. He's never felt that weird tingly feeling when he first met someone or the so-called butterflies in his stomach when he sees someone smile. Max just says a vague description to appease his friend and moves on. 

Max was 17 when he first experienced what it was really like to have a first crush. It was out of curiosity that Max looks up the current crop of Red Bull juniors who could possibly become his teammate. Some of them he's heard of but he's never really put face to name and his father's warning that everyone's the competition ringing at the back of his mind. His eyes land on a tanned skinned boy with lush dark hair and brown eyes. Max feels something tug in his chest as he looks up the name _Carlos Sainz Jr._

Months later, Max found out who his teammate will be and he feels his palms sweat as he walks to where he was needed. When Max was finally introduced to Carlos, they shake hands and Max wasn't sure if he felt a bit of static as Carlos smiles at him and he feels something weird, almost like a strange pressure, in his stomach. He smiles back at the Spaniard and they were left alone to get to know each other. When Max got home that night he finally knew who his first crush is. 

For all his skills as a racing driver, Max sucked at getting dates. He's never had a first date, be it with a girl or a guy, it wasn't just something that was easy for him. A part of him was afraid that he's get stood up if he ever asked someone out and he wasn't sure if he could deal with the rejection. All he's done was go on group dates with his friends and some girl they try to set him up with but he always felt out of place no matter how nice the company was and if he had fun. 

They were in Barcelona during the first winter test, Max was going over the data that's been collected during the day from the car when he hears someone knocking on his door. He knew that it wasn't his dad because he had a spare key to his room so it must be someone from the team. Max was more than surprised to see a smiling Carlos, all bundled up like he was about to go somewhere, stood outside his door. "You wanna grab dinner?" The Spaniard asks with a smile and Max stood there for a few seconds with a dumb look on his face. He felt that weird pressure in his stomach again and his palms were itching. "Come on. You need to experience Spain and I'll show you around, free of charge." Carlos says with a wink and Max feels warm all of a sudden before he nods and grabs his coat. 

Carlos takes him to some tapas bar and orders a few things. He makes sure that Max was able to taste a bit of everything and smile when Max ends up liking something. They end up talking about the on going test and share a few insights on the car until the conversation slowly drifted away from work. "So, anyone caught your eye?" Carlos asks with a smirk and Max feels himself blush. "Aha, come on. I swear I won't tell. Is it another driver?" Carlos tries to prod him but Max just smiles and takes a sip of his drink. They finish their dinner and they take a longer way back to the hotel to work off some of their dinner. Max wasn't sure if he imagined how their fingers would brush against each other as they walk side by side.

Carlos walks him back to his room, which was three doors away from his own, Max smiles at the Spaniard as he unlocks his room. "Thanks for dinner. Everything was delicious." Max says as he pushes open the door but doesn't go in yet. "Well I'm glad you had fun. Who knows, maybe we could make this a thing and have date nights." Carlos says with a chuckle until he notices Max blush and casts his eyes downwards. "What is it?" Carlos asks softly. "It's just, I've never been on a date. Ever." Max says, glad that he wasn't looking directly at Carlos as he admits it. "Well then, I'm glad you had fun on your first date. I'll make sure you'll have a better second date and so on and so forth." Carlos says and Max has to look up in case Carlos was joking but he saw a sincere smile. "Have a goodnight Max." Carlos says as he hugs his teammate and gives him a wave as he goes into his own room. That night, Max falls asleep with the biggest smile on his face thinking about his first date with Carlos. 

Date night eventually became a thing and Max found himself opening up more to Carlos. It also helped that the team kept making them do fun and silly things for the fans. Max found it amazing that despite spending majority of the day together that they'd never run out of things to talk about. He could just listen to Carlos talk for hours and be fascinated by everything that he says. They had a sort of system, how the other would try to cheer up the other one if they had a bad race and if they both did good they would reward themselves with small little treats or by doing something fun and silly. It was during these times that Max slowly felt the pressure leave his stomach and move upwards, towards his chest, his heart. 

It was the middle of the season and Max has stopped counting how many DNFs he's had. It sucked but he has to keep his chin up for the rest of the world. He finds himself leaning against the wall of his room in the motorhome after his engined gave up on him once again. He feels himself slide down and hugs his knees against his chest before he rests his head against them. He wants to cry with how tired he is from everything but he can't with the fear of anyone finding him in such a state. Max doesn't hear his door open until he feels warm hands hold on to his wrists and begin to rub soothing circles. He jerks his head up to see Carlos there in his room with a concerned look on his face. The Spaniard doesn't say anything before he sits next to Max and wraps his arms around the younger man. Max feels the tension leave his body as Carlos' warmth surrounds him. He rests his head against the Spaniard's shoulder and feels Carlos rest his chin on top of his head. Max feels a pair of lips barely grazing the top of his head before he closes his eyes and forgets the rest of the world for the briefest time. 

Max was in love. He was in love with Carlos. He finally had the courage to admit it to himself. Having the courage to admit it to Carlos was a different thing. It was almost as if Max is more afraid of Carlos finding out about his feelings for him than driving at 300 miles per hour. The way that his heart beat would sky rocket when the Spaniard was around. How he had to rub his palms against his jeans with how sweaty they would get when Carlos smiles at him. Max was somewhere between heaven and hell whenever he had to spend time with Carlos. The person he holds dearest to his heart right there beside him but he couldn't do anything about it. 

When Max was asked by the team to drop by Milton Keynes for a few meetings, he just shrugged and packed his bags. But when he found out that Carlos offered to let him stay at his London apartment for the duration of his stay, Max was starting to think that the world is playing tricks on him. Max lands in Heathrow and spots familiar brown eyes and dark hair waiving at him when he steps into the arrival hall. Max smiles and wasn't prepared when Carlos goes in for a hug. "You only brought a backpack with you?" Carlos asks as he looks at Max's lack of luggage. "It's only a few days and I can always wear team shirts." Max says with a shrug. "Come on Maxy, I was going to show you around. Stay for a few more days." Carlos says. "I guess you can always borrow some of my clothes. Make you look stylish for once." Carlos says with a wink as he unlocks his car. Max was blushing at the though of him wearing Carlos' clothes as he climbs into the passenger side of the car. "This is gonna be fun, I promise." Carlos says, beaming at Max as he drives off. 

When they got to Carlos' apartment, Max felt like he was going to pass out. He was here, in Carlos' apartment, he's going to be living with Carlos for the next few days. "So? What do you think?" Carlos asks as he stands next to Max. The question doesn't even register to Max because he's suddenly aware that the entire apartment smells like Carlos and he suddenly can't breath. "Max? Are you okay?" Carlos asks as he steps in front of Max. Max's face was a picture of panic, he can feel sweat starting to form on his brow and his skin felt clammy and cold. "Max. Say something, please?" Carlos asks, worry clear in his voice as he looks at his younger teammate. Max looked pale and was starting to sweat from his brows. He looked like he could pass out at anytime. Carlos tries to slowly maneuver Max to sit down on the couch before he grabs a bottle of water. "Max. What's wrong? You can tell me anything. It's okay." Carlos tries to ask what's wrong as he slowly gets Max to take small sips of water. "I'm sorry. You must think I'm so silly. I just feel so overwhelmed." Max starts. "It's okay, Max. Just calm down." Carlos says as he starts to rub circles on Max's back. "You must be tired. Do you want to take a nap?" Carlos asks the younger man who looks at him for a bit before he nods yes. Carlos slowly guides Max towards the bedroom and makes him sit down on the bed before he bends down to remove Max's shoes. He then pats the bed and asks Max to lie down. "Just rest. You don't have to worry about anything. I'll stay right here." Carlos says as he sits on the other side of his bed. He watches as Max closes his eyes and his breathing evens out. 

Max wakes up to the feeling of someone next to him. When he opens his eyes he notices how he's cuddled up next to Carlos who was looking down at him with a soft smile. "You're cute when you're sleepy." Carlos says with a chuckle as he looks down at Max. "You feeling better?" Carlos asks as he strokes Max's shoulder. "Yeah. Much better." Max says, his voice still thick with sleep. "You're so warm. I'm tempted to keep you as my human heater." Carlos jokes as he tightens his hold on Max. "Be a bit hard when we have to race." Max tries to joke back, enjoying the feeling of Carlos' arms around him. Carlos looks at Max in the eye with a soft smile on his face and the warmest expression on his eyes. "Te amo tanto, no tiene ni idea." Carlos says, knowing that Max will not understand a word. Max couldn't help but be surprised when he heard what Carlos said. He's looked up that phrase and tried to practice saying it over and over again but has never found the courage to say it out loud to the other man. "Me too." Max says, looking at Carlos. "I love you too." Max says and the two of them end up staring at each other trying to process what was going on. "Since I met you I knew you were something else." Carlos says as he strokes the side of Max's face. "Do you want to go with me for dinner? As my boyfriend?" Carlos asks, his eyes wide and bitting his lips, hoping for the best. "Yes. And yes." Max asks as he watches the smile spread on the Spaniard's face. 

The rest of the week was spent mostly together, be it at work or just the two of them, Max and Carlos were inseparable. Weeks turned into months full of getting to know each other and knowing smiles whenever they're around others. Max was surprised how everything just seemed to fall into place. It was as if nothing has changed and yet everything was so different. They would still do silly things and laugh at the stupidest jokes. They would hug each other in front of everyone after a good race but the lingering looks and the knowing smiles conveys so much more between the two of them. During the summer break, Carlos surprised Max by renting out a private villa by the beach in Spain for the two of them. They spent the week basking in the Spanish sun, lazing around and taking walks on the beach hand in hand. The first time they made love, Max didn't want the night to end. Everything was just so perfect with how gentle and good Carlos was to him, how every touch and kiss made him fall in love with the other man even more. 

On the eve of Red Bull's announcement on who will replace the Ferrari bound Daniel, the two of them decided to elope. Both their families have know of their intentions to get married even though no one has made an actual proposal. They spent most of the day together, trying to bloke out everything that would ruin the mood. It was Max who made the first move. "Let's get married." He says as he and Carlos were folding up their clothes, getting ready for another race weekend. "Is this you proposing?" Carlos looks at him with a raised eyebrow. "No. Yes. Sort off. Let's just elope." Max says, trying to gauge Carlos' reaction. "In a few hours we'll both get a call from Marko and one of us will go to Red Bull and the other will have to stay at Toro Rosso or be dropped. I don't want anymore reason to be apart from you. We don't know if it's a few garages away or a completely different series but I don't want to be apart from you." Max adds. Carlos was still looking at him with wide eyes before he sighs and walks to their closet. He comes back out a few seconds later holding his and Max's suit. "You think these still fit us?" Carlos asks with a smile as Max walks over to him. "Is this you saying yes?" Max asks before Carlos gives him a quick kiss. "Yes. Let's get married." Carlos says when they break apart and they head off with their suits to the registry office. 

When the new season rolled, it was Carlos who was sporting the colors of Red Bull Racing while Max stayed at Toro Rosso. But what caught the attention of the world media was that despite racing for completely different teams, the two of them decided to carry on the rest of their careers with their new last name. Max gave Carlos a quick kiss before he heads off to his motorhome and immediately a swarm of reporters have him cornered. "Max how does being married changed you as a racing driver?" One reporter asks and Max flashes them with his most dazzling smile before he answers them. "Well we did talk about whoever finishes higher than the other gets to skip doing the dishes." Max says to them before he disappears into the garage marked **Sainz-Verstappen.**

A few years down the line, the two of them eventually ended up both in Red Bull with pundits making jokes on how they have the same last name on their garages but the two of them wouldn't have it any other way. The resurgence of Red Bull as a championship winning team was evident even during winter testing and as the season progressed, it was Max and Carlos battling for the title, sharing podium after podium with the biggest smile on their face. When asked how they keep their marriage intact despite their on track rivalry they just shrugged and looked at each other. "It's easy. As rivals, we want to beat each other but as husbands we are each other's biggest fan." Carlos says as he smiles at Max on his right, forgetting the room full of reporters and cameras recording every word they say. Carlos only had eyes for Max and Max only had eyes for Carlos. That's how they've always been and that's how they will always stay.

**Author's Note:**

> Te amo tanto, no tiene ni idea - I love you so much, you have no idea.


End file.
